Episode 4

Often-Asked Questions About Grief

Published on: 25th June, 2020

No one knows the correct way to experience grief because everyone’s journey of grief is different.  However, many people ask how long will I be grieving and when can I expect to be finished?  In today’s episode Marshall & Steve provide their thoughts on this difficult question.  Some people ask is it possible to grieve something I will never experience? Marshall provides his thoughts on this topic. In today’s episode Steve shares his answer to “should I stay in touch with my loved ones’ friends”?  Marshall and Steve both share their experience concerning “is it possible grief can affect my faith?” All these questions and more in this episode of Hope Thru Grief.

Do you have a question or questions about grief? Send an email to hopethrugrief@gmail.com and we will read and answer your question on our next episode. Please share our show with anyone you know that is struggling with loss and grief. You can find us on the internet to continue the conversation!

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Tune in for new episodes every Thursday morning wherever you listen to podcasts!

Marshall Adler and Steve Smelski, co-hosts of Hope Thru Grief are not medical, or mental health professionals, therefore we cannot and will not give any medical, or mental health advice. If you, or anyone you know needs medical or mental health treatment, please contact a medical or mental health professional immediately.

Thank you

Marshall Adler

Steve Smelski

Transcript
Marshall Adler:

Hello, this is Marshall Adler.

Marshall Adler:

I want to thank you so much for joining us today with my good friend

Marshall Adler:

and cohost Steve Smelski . Steve, can you please say hi to everybody?

Steve Smelski:

Hello everyone.

Steve Smelski:

And thank you for joining us for today's episode of Hope Thru Grief.

Marshall Adler:

I want to, again, thank everybody for listening in

Marshall Adler:

today, but what I want to dois actually talk a little bit about

Marshall Adler:

where we left off at our last episode.

Marshall Adler:

And what I want to do is ask Steve a question that we didn't get a

Marshall Adler:

chance to really cover last time.

Marshall Adler:

And that is whether grief ever really ends and whether you're

Marshall Adler:

ever through the grief process.

Marshall Adler:

So Steve, if you could just sort of give us your impressions of whether

Marshall Adler:

your journey of grief has ever ended and where you are on that journey today,

Steve Smelski:

I would say, and I think Shelly would say the same thing.

Steve Smelski:

I don't think the journey ever ends.

Steve Smelski:

We are different than we were when we had Jordan, we view things differently.

Steve Smelski:

And I know we were talking about the different things that, and Shelly and I

Steve Smelski:

been able to do over the last six years.

Steve Smelski:

I don't want to give everybody the wrong impression that we don't have bad days

Steve Smelski:

or tough times because we still do.

Steve Smelski:

We've learned that if it's a difficult weekend and because it's mother's

Steve Smelski:

day or father's day, We'll stay home.

Steve Smelski:

We know our safe zone.

Steve Smelski:

It's here at the house.

Steve Smelski:

If we have people over and we know it's going to be a tough time, because

Steve Smelski:

it's an anniversary date, we'll do it early so we can quit early and

Steve Smelski:

then it's just us and we can make it through the rest of the evening.

Steve Smelski:

We have learned to what's the right word.

Steve Smelski:

We've, we've learned to avoid the difficult spots and the difficult

Steve Smelski:

things that come up for us, which means on the difficult days,

Steve Smelski:

we're better off now going out.

Steve Smelski:

We won't go out for dinner.

Steve Smelski:

It's just something that never ends.

Steve Smelski:

I remember we were at my brother's house and he and his wife, they had

Steve Smelski:

helped raise Jordan and he spent a lot of his first couple of years

Steve Smelski:

with them while Shelley and I were working, they did daycare for us.

Steve Smelski:

We were talking about how difficult it was one night to try and go on without Jordan.

Steve Smelski:

And my brother looked up the picture that they have in the family room.

Steve Smelski:

And he said, you know, all three of those people are gone.

Steve Smelski:

They're not here anymore.

Steve Smelski:

And it really hit home that I think he was spot on.

Steve Smelski:

We're not the same people.

Steve Smelski:

Jordan's not here.

Steve Smelski:

We're not the people who were before.

Marshall Adler:

The journey of grief to me is sort of been hijacked by

Marshall Adler:

the idea that it's linear and that the stages of grief are numerical

Marshall Adler:

and you go from one to the other, to the other, then your journey is over.

Marshall Adler:

And I can just stay personally.

Marshall Adler:

That has not been my experience.

Marshall Adler:

I have gone through the stages of grief, numerically, and going

Marshall Adler:

forward, going backwards, stayed at the same spot and so my question,

Marshall Adler:

have you had a similar experience with the nonlinear journey of grief?

Steve Smelski:

We have many times it's one step forward and two steps back.

Steve Smelski:

I remember feeling very angry a couple months after Jordan's passing.

Steve Smelski:

And ended up started taking a class on grief and learning that everything that

Steve Smelski:

we were feeling was completely normal.

Steve Smelski:

A lot of people experienced and feel the same things.

Steve Smelski:

And we got through the anger and it came back two or three weeks later.

Steve Smelski:

And I remember being so upset.

Steve Smelski:

It's like, man, I got through this, I checked it off.

Steve Smelski:

I got over it the first time.

Steve Smelski:

It came back four or five times for me.

Steve Smelski:

And it was a phase of two or three weeks of anger and then maybe a week off.

Steve Smelski:

And then it kept coming back.

Steve Smelski:

What I did realize the third time though, was I had experienced the second time I

Steve Smelski:

knew it was a wave and it would go away.

Steve Smelski:

I just didn't know how long it would be, but that first time it

Steve Smelski:

comes back, you're caught off guard.

Steve Smelski:

You're not expecting that.

Marshall Adler:

How did it deal with it when you, when it did come back?

Marshall Adler:

Because obviously you did with so many different emotions and the emotion of you

Marshall Adler:

thinking that you're not making progress, or are you thinking that this is abnormal?

Marshall Adler:

Are you thinking that am I losing my mind are all issues that I've heard

Marshall Adler:

many people going through the pre process experience if you had any

Marshall Adler:

similar experience during your process?

Steve Smelski:

Yes.

Steve Smelski:

I think I felt all three of those thought I was going crazy.

Steve Smelski:

I thought there was something wrong with me.

Steve Smelski:

I didn't understand why I was going back through it.

Steve Smelski:

There's so many things that we don't understand as we try

Steve Smelski:

and walk this path of grief.

Steve Smelski:

And until somebody tells you, you know, that is perfectly normal.

Steve Smelski:

A lot of people experienced that you think you're, you're abnormal.

Steve Smelski:

You think you're not doing it right?

Steve Smelski:

There is no right journey.

Steve Smelski:

There's no correct path to take takes however long it takes.

Steve Smelski:

And it takes you wherever.

Steve Smelski:

It's going to take you.

Marshall Adler:

One of the factors that I've dealt with in my own journey of grief

Marshall Adler:

that I never really read much about or heard a lot of people discussing is the

Marshall Adler:

laws of the anticipation of the future.

Marshall Adler:

By that, I mean, so many things in life are future oriented.

Marshall Adler:

You go to school to get an education, to get a job.

Marshall Adler:

So you can start a family, support the family and get your life going in a

Marshall Adler:

manner that you want it to be unfolding.

Marshall Adler:

Obviously life will throw you curve balls that can change the

Marshall Adler:

best laid plans of us humans.

Marshall Adler:

But the one thing that does apply to so many people that are

Marshall Adler:

trying to better themselves is.

Marshall Adler:

for the lack of better term deferred gratification.

Marshall Adler:

I'm going to work hard now in school to get this diploma, then I'm gonna work hard

Marshall Adler:

at my job to have a good financial base where my family that's all good and well,

Marshall Adler:

but the pay off for doing that is the better future that you hope will unfold.

Marshall Adler:

Obviously you and I both lost sons and part of my grief has been the

Marshall Adler:

loss of the anticipation of the good future of seeing my son Matt grow up.

Marshall Adler:

I was fortunate enough to see Matt turned into a wonderful young man at age 32, but

Marshall Adler:

I'll never know how he would be at 42.

Marshall Adler:

52 62 or 72.

Marshall Adler:

So my question to you is have you had similar feelings and

Marshall Adler:

how have you dealt with it?

Steve Smelski:

Yes, I would say both Shelly and I have had those feelings.

Steve Smelski:

Interesting enough.

Steve Smelski:

I think it's been over the last couple of years for us, not so much.

Steve Smelski:

The first two years that we've started thinking about all of the

Steve Smelski:

things we're not going to have.

Steve Smelski:

Jordan was 11 when he passed away 11 and a half.

Steve Smelski:

So we never saw what he was going to grow into or what he's going to

Steve Smelski:

look like as an adult, you mentioned go to school, go to high school.

Steve Smelski:

Well, there's graduation inthere, graduation's a big thing that the

Steve Smelski:

parents want to see their child graduate.

Steve Smelski:

Then go to college and watch them graduate college.

Steve Smelski:

If they don't go to college, maybe they start a job and they get married and

Steve Smelski:

all of a sudden you've got the wedding.

Steve Smelski:

We've, we've started to realize the different things we're not

Steve Smelski:

going to experience with Jordan.

Steve Smelski:

We're grateful for the first 11 and a half, but Jordan would have been 17

Steve Smelski:

now in August, he would have been going into his senior year of high school.

Steve Smelski:

Uh, we'll never have a senior graduation picture.

Steve Smelski:

We'll never watch him graduate.

Steve Smelski:

And we're just, sometimes we wonder what those would be like.

Marshall Adler:

Have you kept in touch with some of Jordan's good friends during

Marshall Adler:

their development towards adulthood and how that been for you to see them grow up?

Steve Smelski:

We have, and thankfully they've wanted to stay

Steve Smelski:

in touch with us, the closest ones.

Steve Smelski:

Couple of them we hadn't seen for a couple of years.

Steve Smelski:

We didn't even recognize him.

Steve Smelski:

Almost all of his friends are taller than I am now.

Steve Smelski:

And I look up to him and Jordan never passed me in height.

Steve Smelski:

So it's awesome that they want to meet us for breakfast or lunch every once

Steve Smelski:

in a while and still let us know how they're doing and what's going on.

Steve Smelski:

And they tell us some Jordan stories that we never got to hear, but it's a little

Steve Smelski:

bit sad and a little bit painful realizing that we never got Jordan to that point.

Marshall Adler:

Steve, let me just ask you this.

Marshall Adler:

Growing up.

Marshall Adler:

I wanted to always have children because I had a very good

Marshall Adler:

relationship with my parents.

Marshall Adler:

And although I knew I needed to get an education go to law school so I could

Marshall Adler:

support the family that I would have.

Marshall Adler:

The essence of my being was always wanting to be a father because I wanted

Marshall Adler:

to have the same relationship with my children that I had with my parents.

Marshall Adler:

And I was fortunate enough to have two wonderful sons, but obviously after Matt's

Marshall Adler:

passing my view of the assets of my being was shaken to its core because I lost my

Marshall Adler:

child andI have talked to many people who have gone through the grief experience and

Marshall Adler:

told me that they've had issues of faith that has been affected by their grief.

Marshall Adler:

Some people have told me that their faith has gotten stronger.

Marshall Adler:

Some people told me their faith has gotten weaker or disappeared entirely.

Marshall Adler:

I know that you and Shelly are very strong people of faith.

Marshall Adler:

And I'd be interested in how your journey of grief with the loss of

Marshall Adler:

Jordan has affected your faith.

Marshall Adler:

I think for me, it has definitely increased and become much stronger.

Marshall Adler:

I grew up going to church, understood about God, about Jesus.

Marshall Adler:

Kind of got away from it through school college.

Marshall Adler:

I always had it in the background, but it was Jordan's death was kind of a

Marshall Adler:

wake up call for me and I've completely embraced it and gone towards it.

Marshall Adler:

Shelly was always much stronger in her faith than I was

Marshall Adler:

even from the day I met her.

Marshall Adler:

And I think she struggled right after Jordan's death and she questioned

Marshall Adler:

why, and didn't understand why I, um, didn't understand what was

Marshall Adler:

going to happen or why it happened or how we going to make it through.

Marshall Adler:

And I would say in the last few years, it's turned right

Marshall Adler:

around and become very strong.

Marshall Adler:

It's it's the part that we lean on now because we, we need hope

Marshall Adler:

it's, it's a difficult journey.

Marshall Adler:

How, how about for you?

Marshall Adler:

How has that affected yours?

Marshall Adler:

It's been interesting because I grew up in what's called a

Marshall Adler:

Conservative Jewish Temple.

Marshall Adler:

We went to temple are not every week, but I learned Hebrew at a young

Marshall Adler:

age and I felt that going to temple was a cultural rite of passage in

Marshall Adler:

the sense that a lot of my parents' friends were Jewish went to temple?

Marshall Adler:

I knew a lot of their children who were friends of mine and it was a social and

Marshall Adler:

a cultural exercise that I just felt was part of the process of being Jewish.

Marshall Adler:

We had some relatives that were very Orthodox.

Marshall Adler:

We also had some relatives that were not religious at all.

Marshall Adler:

And I grew up in Buffalo, New York, and it was ironic that from the

Marshall Adler:

age of four, we lived from the time of my birth to the age of four.

Marshall Adler:

We lived across the street from my father's parents.

Marshall Adler:

So up until the age of four, I remember my mother walking me across

Marshall Adler:

the street to have lunch with my grandfather, which was sort of cool.

Marshall Adler:

I got very, very close to him, but I was always amazed at, I never

Marshall Adler:

saw my grandfather go to temple.

Marshall Adler:

I never saw him really being involved in a lot of the ceremonial

Marshall Adler:

aspects of the Jewish religion.

Marshall Adler:

And I learned later that my grandfather actually was not religious.

Marshall Adler:

And my father told me that my grandfather's father, which is my

Marshall Adler:

obviously great grandfather and my father's grandfather was extremely

Marshall Adler:

religious and my grandfather sort of rebelled against his father.

Marshall Adler:

And I can't say that I rebelled against the Jewish religion, but the

Marshall Adler:

aspect that was most important to me was the cultural social aspect.

Marshall Adler:

So my faith, I think, has always been there, but not the basis of my core

Marshall Adler:

essence of being someone who's Jewish .After Matt's passing, I felt that the

Marshall Adler:

community support, I felt that the support of the rabbi, I felt the continuation of

Marshall Adler:

Jewish history was something that actually strengthened my Judaism because if you

Marshall Adler:

look at the Jewish history, you know, the old, there's an old joke that Jewish

Marshall Adler:

people are considered the chosen people.

Marshall Adler:

And the old joke is even look at Jewish history, which is filled with tragedy.

Marshall Adler:

The old joke is couldn't God have chosen somebody else, because if

Marshall Adler:

you look at Jewish history, it from the being slaves in Egypt, Spanish

Marshall Adler:

inquisition crusades, the Holocaust.

Marshall Adler:

It's just been a lot of sorrow, a lot of tragedy.

Marshall Adler:

It just has so to me, as crazy as it sounds, the suffering of the

Marshall Adler:

Jewish people is in some ways been a comfort in the sense that it just

Marshall Adler:

sort of fits what the universe might have planned out for all of us.

Marshall Adler:

And I think the way I look at it is all going to be here such a short time.

Marshall Adler:

And my understanding, I asked my rabbi about the Jewish view of afterlife.

Marshall Adler:

And I won't get too much into it.

Marshall Adler:

But what he said is that the Jewish view is you really have to concentrate on being

Marshall Adler:

the best person you can in this life.

Marshall Adler:

And then the afterlife will take care of itself from that.

Marshall Adler:

So the fact that Matt lives such a good life, helping so many people.

Marshall Adler:

That to me, it showed that the quality of life that he led was the important thing.

Marshall Adler:

He didn't have quantity,he didn't have longevity, but

Marshall Adler:

that's always a relative term.

Marshall Adler:

Because all of us are going to be here a short time, whether he

Marshall Adler:

lived at 32 or 92, it's short.

Marshall Adler:

What do you do with the time?

Marshall Adler:

It's not how you died, it's how you lived.

Marshall Adler:

So to answer your question, I would say it didn't make my faith stronger or weaker.

Marshall Adler:

It made it different.

Marshall Adler:

And the difference that I see now is a continuum of not just

Marshall Adler:

Judaism, but humanity that so many people have lost loved ones.

Marshall Adler:

And the effect on society has been huge and I I'll just digress for a second.

Marshall Adler:

After Matt passed away, I was doing a lot of reading doing research on

Marshall Adler:

people that lost children and I read this story about this man called Leland.

Marshall Adler:

He lost his teenage son Typhoid when they were in Italy and he was a very

Marshall Adler:

wealthy citizen of state of California and actually became the governor.

Marshall Adler:

It was his only child and he was so distraught after he lost his son.

Marshall Adler:

Leland jr.

Marshall Adler:

They didn't know what he was going to do with the rest of his life.

Marshall Adler:

And he decided that he told his wife we're going to adopt all of

Marshall Adler:

children in the state of California.

Marshall Adler:

She goes, what do you mean?

Marshall Adler:

He says, I'm starting a school.

Marshall Adler:

And his wife, I said, okay.

Marshall Adler:

And he did start a school.

Marshall Adler:

And the school that he started is called the Leland.

Marshall Adler:

Junior Stanford university, which obviously everybody

Marshall Adler:

calls Stanford University.

Marshall Adler:

Nobody calls it the Leland Junior Stanford university,

Marshall Adler:

because nobody knows the story.

Marshall Adler:

So if you look at the big cosmic universe as the effect of Leland Stanford, losing

Marshall Adler:

his son and the effect on humanity.

Marshall Adler:

It's humongous.

Marshall Adler:

We're talking over technology that might not have even been in existence.

Marshall Adler:

If Stanford University wasn't in existence.

Marshall Adler:

Obviously Stanford University is in Silicon Valley and the technological

Marshall Adler:

advances that we've all been using because of that, who knows if that ever would

Marshall Adler:

have happened if Leland Stanford jJr.

Marshall Adler:

did not die at a young age in Italy.

Marshall Adler:

So my point being is I think looking at a more macro view of my Judaism and

Marshall Adler:

my view of humanity is just changed.

Marshall Adler:

It's just not that a stronger, not that it's weaker, it's just different.

Marshall Adler:

I just see it in a much more holistic manner and Matt's life was so well led

Marshall Adler:

that it does give me some contentment and some peace, knowing that he made

Marshall Adler:

the most of his time on this planet, which is what all of us at the end

Marshall Adler:

of the day should strive to do.

Steve Smelski:

I would agree with you that I was surprised that you said you

Steve Smelski:

always knew you wanted to be a father because I'm not sure if I was ever sure.

Steve Smelski:

I think I was okay if I didn't.

Steve Smelski:

I was okay if we did I think.

Steve Smelski:

I remember when Shelley told me she was pregnant.

Steve Smelski:

I got really nervous because I was really worried about being a good dad.

Steve Smelski:

And I was worried.

Steve Smelski:

I, I wouldn't measure up or live up to that.

Steve Smelski:

I, um, I embraced it.

Steve Smelski:

He was definitely, he was colicky as a kid.

Steve Smelski:

He didn't sleep through the night for two years.

Steve Smelski:

And when you hold him for the first time you realized you would do anything to

Steve Smelski:

make the live and to be successful.

Steve Smelski:

And even if you had to lay down your own life for him, and, um, it was such a

Steve Smelski:

rich experience having Jordan as a son.

Steve Smelski:

I'm so glad I didn't forego that experience.

Steve Smelski:

So even though we only had them in 11 and a half years, I wouldn't,

Steve Smelski:

I wouldn't give up any of them.

Steve Smelski:

To not go through the pain.

Steve Smelski:

One thing that I've really focused on since he passed away was, and

Steve Smelski:

somebody had said this to me once that it's not how you start, it's how

Steve Smelski:

you finish and I want to finish well.

Marshall Adler:

I can definitely agree with that.

Marshall Adler:

I mean, I know.

Marshall Adler:

That everything I know about you, you were an excellent father and Jordan

Marshall Adler:

was lucky to have you as his father.

Marshall Adler:

And I feel I was lucky to have Matt as a son.

Marshall Adler:

And all the pain that you experienced to the grief process is directly

Marshall Adler:

related to the amount of love that you have for that person.

Marshall Adler:

So the more you love them, the more pain, the more grief.

Marshall Adler:

And is that a trade off that I would take again?

Marshall Adler:

And the answer is absolutely every day of the week, because grief is part

Marshall Adler:

of the life cycle because death is probably the life cycle and getting back

Marshall Adler:

to what I was talking about earlier.

Marshall Adler:

I think when you realize that nothing in life is permanent, everything's temporary,

Marshall Adler:

you own nothing, nothing stays the same and you have to be present oriented

Marshall Adler:

to make the most out of every minute.

Marshall Adler:

And, you know, my, my father is a funny guy and he used

Marshall Adler:

to say a lot of funny things.

Marshall Adler:

A lot of it was very smart also.

Marshall Adler:

And he would say live every day, like it's going to be your last, because one day

Marshall Adler:

you're going to be right, which is true.

Marshall Adler:

There's a last day out there for all of us.

Marshall Adler:

We don't know what it is, but it's something that makes you appreciate

Marshall Adler:

the time that you have and with children, it is all temporary.

Marshall Adler:

They grow up and they change and I think that the enjoyment that you get is

Marshall Adler:

something that stays with you forever.

Marshall Adler:

And that is why to me, the grief process, after man's passing, it's almost a

Marshall Adler:

continuation of my still being a father because I'm grieving him as a father.

Marshall Adler:

He's not here.

Marshall Adler:

But it's just a different modality of my relationship with him.

Marshall Adler:

It's just a different way of interacting between a father and a son.

Marshall Adler:

And I think if both of us were not the fathers that we were, and we're not

Marshall Adler:

as adamant about telling the world.

Marshall Adler:

How are sons were wonderful human beings.

Marshall Adler:

We probably wouldn't even be doing this show because we want to make sure that

Marshall Adler:

the good work that they did while they were here on this earth among us is

Marshall Adler:

continued by us because they're not here.

Marshall Adler:

Would you agree with that sentiment?

Steve Smelski:

I do.

Steve Smelski:

It's almost like you feel the need to continue on their work for them

Steve Smelski:

because they're not here to do it.

Steve Smelski:

You don't know what that is yet.

Steve Smelski:

So Jordan was always our purpose.

Steve Smelski:

We focused on him our days, our weeks, our years are focused

Steve Smelski:

on Jordan, on school, our time together, our vacation everything's

Steve Smelski:

centered around Jordan for us.

Steve Smelski:

And we, we asked for meetings with teachers over and over again so we

Steve Smelski:

got him where he was successful.

Steve Smelski:

That's all we cared about was his success.

Steve Smelski:

And our focus was on him when he died.

Steve Smelski:

I think we began to realize our purpose is still about Jordan.

Steve Smelski:

That's why we share his story and why we tell people how he was infected.

Steve Smelski:

And it may be rare, but it doesn't mean that we don't want to make

Steve Smelski:

Jordan our purpose going forward.

Steve Smelski:

And that's pretty much how we've been able to get through the last few years.

Marshall Adler:

I'll say this, I know firsthand that the foundation that

Marshall Adler:

you and Shelley set up in Jordan's name has done such good work.

Marshall Adler:

And who knows how many lives will be positively effected or saved because

Marshall Adler:

of the foundation that exists in George name, which again, it's an example of

Marshall Adler:

what I talked about with Leland Stanford.

Marshall Adler:

The fact that somebody still isn't here physically doesn't mean that

Marshall Adler:

their good work can continue forever.

Marshall Adler:

And that is, I think a part of grief that to me is the hope.

Marshall Adler:

That the essence of your lost loved one will continue on through you

Marshall Adler:

and whoever can take the mantle and continue with it after we're gone.

Marshall Adler:

And I hope that for both Jordan's sake and Matt's sake, they will continue on.

Marshall Adler:

For many, many, many generations.

Marshall Adler:

And I think that is, to me, the biggest hope that grief can give to

Marshall Adler:

you, realizing that again, we're all here for a short time make the most

Marshall Adler:

of it and make the impact that will have your good work to continue on.

Marshall Adler:

For generations after you're not here.

Steve Smelski:

I couldn't agree more.

Marshall Adler:

Well, Steve, I again want to thank you so much for talking

Marshall Adler:

about your journey and I know that you and Shelley have been so good to

Marshall Adler:

me and Debbie with respect to opening up with your grief share experience

Marshall Adler:

and becoming a good friends to discuss obviously very personal, intimate journeys

Marshall Adler:

that we have and I always feel like I learned something from you when I talk.

Marshall Adler:

And that's why I like the opportunity to have an interaction with people

Marshall Adler:

that are going through grief, because it is a journey that

Marshall Adler:

is different for every person.

Marshall Adler:

And I want to keep on learning the rest of my life, because I know what we said

Marshall Adler:

at the beginning of this episode is true.

Marshall Adler:

The grief never ends, and it's a journey that will be with us

Marshall Adler:

until we take our last breath.

Marshall Adler:

But again, the idea is to get to that hope that makes the journey

Marshall Adler:

worthwhile to be a tribute and a Testament to our lost, loved ones.

Marshall Adler:

So I can't thank you enough for opening up today with insightful,

Marshall Adler:

helpful comments about your experience through your journey of grief.

Steve Smelski:

Oh, you're very welcome.

Steve Smelski:

I wanted to thank you for sharing some of your stories today, and

Steve Smelski:

we'd like to thank everybody for joining us today on Hope Thru Grief.

Marshall Adler:

Thank you very much.

Marshall Adler:

and will talk to you next time.

Steve Smelski:

Thank you for joining us on hope through grief with your

Steve Smelski:

cohost Marshall Adler and Steve

Steve Smelski:

Smelski.

Marshall Adler:

We hope our episode today was helpful and informative

Marshall Adler:

.Since we are not medical or mental health professionals, we cannot

Marshall Adler:

and will not provide any medical, psychological, or mental health advice.

Marshall Adler:

Therefore, if you or anyone you know requires medical or mental health

Marshall Adler:

treatment, please contact a medical or mental health professional immediately.

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About the Podcast

Hope Thru Grief
Our mission is to create a community to bring hope through grief. Providing healing through our first hand experiences. Each day provides us an opportunity to continue to heal, as we get to meet and help others.
Have you recently lost a loved one? Are you struggling with grief? Don’t understand why the world has moved on and you are stuck? Wondering what will help? Have you lost all hope you will get back to any kind of “normal”?

Hope Thru Grief features husband and wife co-hosts Steve Smelski and Shelly Smelski to discuss their journeys of grief, after losing their son and other family members. They have changed their focus in life since their son’s death and have been helping others to find the support and answers they have been searching for.

Expect the unexpected. Honest and transparent discussions will reveal things hidden and overlooked which are quite common in coping with grief. Steve & Shelly will interview people from all walks of life, sharing their journeys of loss, as well as experts on recovery and finding hope in a world that has been changed forever.

If you are struggling with your grief, let’s talk together about ways to find healing in your journey and make it more meaningful and life-changing.

New Episodes every Thursday morning.

About your hosts

Randy Magray

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Randy has been producing podcasts for a decade as a creator, writer, host, and post-production specialist. He currently is the Podcast Producer for Duck Duck Productions in Orlando Florida and has worked extensively with the Smelski's on Hope Thru Grief and their Jordan Smelski Foundation for Amoeba Awareness.

Steve Smelski

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